The most realistic video game cats

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If you were to believe the video game industry, you might think cats are adorable. In games like Stray or Monster Hunter, cats are adorable little balls of fur that exist in a world much bigger than themselves. They have big eyes and bigger paws. You’d be forgiven for wanting to take one home.



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But no ! Don’t fall for Big Feline’s pawpaganda! Real-life cats are apathetic terrors who only care about themselves, offloading your hard work while they bask in sunshine after lousy sunshine. There are precious few games that are brave enough to tell the truth about these horrible creatures.

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4 Big the Cat, Sonic the Hedgehog

Introduced in the Sonic Adventure games, Big The Cat appears at first glance to be a cuddly and friendly guy, far from the stereotype of feline indifference. But take a closer look.

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All Big wants to do is hang out in the forest and fish; he doesn’t care about the trials and tribulations of the world, and he’s content to stay safe in his little bubble, oblivious to the chaos unfolding elsewhere. He is the very image of feline laziness.

3 Mae, night in the woods

Cats are selfish creatures. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing, whether it’s working or cooking or saving someone’s life; if a cat wants something from you, that’s the only important thing in the world. Mae is the same way. A young woman… uh, a cat, she returns to her hometown after leaving school and quickly reintegrates into the lives of her old friends.

It takes the whole game for him to realize that his high school friendships can’t just pick up where they left off, and that pthe people cats need to change. In the meantime, she spends her time jumping on neighborhood cars and not pay for repairs. Boo!

2 Judd, Splatoon

In the post-apocalyptic world of Splatoon, mutant children spend their days fighting in seemingly automated capitalist hellscapes. All the while, Judd watches the proceedings, his lazy cat eyes watching the carnage without a trace of emotion.

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When each battle is over, Judd momentarily descends from his haughty perch to announce a victor, the only time a recognizable emotion crosses his face; it’s as if his only joy and entertainment in this world comes from watching young people destroy themselves. Splatoon lore indicates that Judd could be immortal, an eldritch god sent to judge the failures and frailties of normal people. How very feline.

1 Rover, Animal Crossing

Our introduction to Animal Crossing came from Rover, a curious little beast who sat next to us on the train in the very first game. Despite the incredible rudeness of bothering a stranger, Rover can’t keep his paws off our business; he asks us where we’re going, what we’re doing, what our names are, and if we have a place to stay, among other incredibly intrusive questions.

It’s like my cat Fluffy, who always wants to get up in my space when I’m just trying to write an article oh fuck Fluffy not now… skasdjfgskjdhgfdksfs

NEXT: The Best Cats In Video Game History

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